Overall Rating: ★★★★★
Storyline: ★★★★ ½
Narrator: Caroline McLaughlin
Audiobook Length: 6hr 52m
Release Date: 02-02-2018
Reading Time: 6 minutes
*FTC Disclaimer: I received a review copy of Diary of an Alligator Queen from Winter Reid and narrator Caroline McLaughlin in exchange for an honest review. I have in no way been influenced by the author, publisher, or narrator’s generosity. You can’t fake these stars, baby!
The only thing that sucks worse than being attacked by a vampire is turning into one.
Nadine Levitt expected her twenty-eighth year of life to include wedding cake and a work promotion, not a three-day stint as a bloodsucker’s all-you-can-eat buffet. She escapes her captor’s swampy lair alive, but not quite human.
As it happens, becoming a vampire isn’t an overnight thing, more like a year-long marathon of misery—including insomnia, teething, and weird urges. And the only person who can guide her through it isn’t a person at all, but the stupidly attractive, reclusive monster responsible for her condition.
Nadine can’t change her fate, but she won’t go quietly either. With her clock running out, a death wish, and an unexpected companion, she’s determined to take out as many vampires as she can in the time she has left. Turns out, she has a talent.
One year of humanity. A city full of hungry vamps. What would you do?
First Line: “My Dear Nadine, our city is strange enough without the gifts the river brings, but it brings them just the same.”
If I sounded even remotely like Caroline, I would not have chosen the standard monotone voicemail greeting. Let’s be honest. People would call me all day and all night just to listen to my answering machine because it would be five freaking minutes long. Yes. Please.
I love Caroline McLaughlin and you all know this by now. Her tone is deep and so, so raspy, but it’s never tired. It’s like she’s been drinking whiskey all day, well, without the whiskey. You know what I mean…
Long story short, no one has a voice like Caroline.
Her comedic timing is pretty perfect in every book she’s performed—and there’s a lot of humor in this one!—but there’s an eau de Caroline here that really resonated with me. If you’ve listened to some of her other narrations, this one is very different. Diary of an Alligator Queen unveils a different skill set I didn’t know Caroline had. If I could put a name to the way this audiobook made me feel, I would call it Naughty Smile Syndrome. Do not listen to this audiobook at work because you will have a lascivious grin on your face all day (trust me on this one). Listen to this in private.
Caroline, I love you, yet I still kind of hate you. Voice envy. Life isn’t fair, friends.
Ten years ago, he’d have spelled trouble. Age and maturity made it possible for me to simply imagine licking his dimples and file him in my spank bank.
When I first saw the title of this book I thought Nadine was an alligator shapeshifter. Shows how much I know…
This. is. so. much. better. than. that!
We are first introduced to Nadine. She’s got the perfect life, the perfect doctor boyfriend (hubba hubba!) and she appears to be totally happy. But, as we know, looks are deceiving. Gah, her beau should be called Doctor Douche! He’s not good enough for her…but I still kind of loved him too…I’m sick-headed, I know. But Winter Reid did an amazing job formulating these characters.
Nadine just doesn’t realize that there’s a better life for her. There’s also a better man…
Meidias. Swoon. What a vamp. What a name! Well, if it is his name. He’s so old he wouldn’t remember.
Nadine is attacked by a vampire but everyone keeps telling her it’s a dog bite. *snort* So she plays investigator—I love this side of her personality!—and goes back to the crime scene. DUN DUN DUN! She nearly gets eaten by an alligator! Have y’all seen an alligator? They’re huge.
But of course, the swoony Meidias saves her. Ha. Turns out that Meidias is the one who nommed on her neck in the first place.
Now, she’s turning into a vampy vamp and her life is getting a serious face lift.
This paranormal read has a very contemporary vibe. It’s unique in every way! Add Caroline McLaughlin as a narrator and it’s a done deal. Nadine doesn’t want this new life. She wants to live happily ever after with Mr. Wrong and go back to her ordinary life. (Doesn’t sound so perfect anymore, eh?)
But then something changes. She sees her life through a different lens. Perhaps it’s the fact that she’s becoming immortal, maybe it’s because Meidias is showing her all she’s worth. That man. Lemme tell ya.
I loved Nadine. I usually gravitate toward the hero in books, but I could not help myself from being drawn to her. She is unintentionally dragging herself through the mud under the illusion that she’s actually happy, but she just doesn’t know any better. Then she’s stuck in this limbo of being the predator as well as the prey.
But you know what? I have no idea how Winter Reid did it, but Nadine’s final transition was completely unexpected. It was emotional, physical and psychological. I didn’t know what to expect in the beginning, but by the end I had Naughty Smile Syndrome and now I just want to find a swamp and some alligators to talk to. Maybe Prince Charming will come my way.
Are there any swamps in Idaho? I’m going to go look. Please hold.